Some people deserve to die. Some people are so stupid and do things that entitle them to instant erasure from this World. Their death may even be a blessing to mankind in that it stops the dilution of the gene pool. Thus, there are times when particular conducts allow you to feel little sympathy for people. These are things you can blame poverty for… poverty of common sense, that is! And, if anyone was that stupid…

Don’t play with electricity
I should be so dead. I have had two instances when I should have died. And, it would have been well deserved. Only last month, I decided to remove a slice of bread from the toaster using a knife. The knife touched the elements and short-circuited the whole house. Lucky bugger. The electricity could have burnt my socks off! Similar happened to a patient of mine who played with electricity. He is also lucky to be alive, but, only just. His brain and spinal cord were so fried he needs help to feed.

Don’t play with fire
A man decides to pour petrol into the generator. But, because he couldn’t see well, he asked his son to bring light. No problem, daddy. The son went to get the candle so dad can see where to pour the petrol. Well, the daddy, the mummy, the son and baby girl all ended up in the hospital with severe burns. Unfortunately, all ended up dead as well within a few days. Going to sleep with the candlelight still on, in a room without ventilation and being careless around petrol are tried and tested ways to die. Chasing after petrol in broken down petrol tankers and stealing oil from pipes are also not due to ignorance or poverty. These are stupid ways to die and should not happen anymore in our community.

Don’t play with water
A man decided to jump out of the boat into the river for fun. This was not a dare and he was not drunk. He just thought ‘what the heck’, I can do this. Turns out the river was quite deep, with a strong fast-flowing undercurrent. I think they are still looking for his body.

Similarly, please endeavour to cover boreholes and deep holes (even manholes on the streets!) as they are death traps. Only an irresponsible government, person or company will leave deep holes unprotected and without adequate warning signs for the unwary. If with adequate protection and warning signs, someone still ventures where angels fail to the thread…well.

Don’t mix driving with other stuff
Okay, the second episode happened many, many years ago, but I have never forgotten it. It was a great night at the party in Abeokuta. Then, a friend called and requested to be picked up. Yes, I offered to go and get him even though I had been drinking alcohol. Alcohol and driving do not mix and we are both lucky to be alive today. Let me just say it again: Do not drink and drive, and if you were that stupid…

Similarly, do not use your mobile phone while driving. This is really important as many have gone to the far beyond ignoring this simple text message. Do not read text messages or attempt to send texts while driving. It is suicidal. It is a dumb thing to do no matter how smart you think you are and no matter how many times you have gotten away with it. You only need one chance to die.

Don’t waste time with Cancer
Breast cancer is common in Nigeria. It can affect anybody with breasts including men. Ignoring a lump in your breast is therefore dumb. And going to the herbalist, traditional healer or your local chemist is even more stupid. They cannot help you. Cancer cannot be treated or cured by people who sell cures for ‘staphylococcus’ in buses and on the streets. You might as well buy rat poison. It works just as well. This goes for all cancers. Cancer kills and kills faster if ignored. Your best bet is a good hospital with the required specialists and the facility to manage cancer. You need an urgent diagnosis and the right advice. Do not stop until you meet someone sensible and who you can trust with your life.

Again finally on HIV and AIDS
Peter Ebeigbe published results of his study into the ‘knowledge and use of contraception by rural in-school adolescents in Delta State’. In the article, Dr Ebeigbe noted that about 65% had had sex at age 15 years. But, perhaps more worrying is that only 31% (31 in 100) used a condom consistently, 39% practised coitus interruptus while 25% relied on ‘washing the private parts’ to prevent pregnancies and diseases! Washing!!

In this day and age of HIV, hepatitis B, C, gonorrhoea etc, if you were still that stupid…

Dr Biodun Ogungbo MBBS, FRCS, FRCSEd, MSc